Once upon a time, in a galaxy far, far away, lived a doofus who liked to run fast. It was sonic the hedgehog, but he died in the late 90s. We don't have the body, we promise! Instead, we took this guy who threw balls. He was living near our studio of stupid storytelling. Last night we ate a sock because we were bankrupt. Maybe this guy could make us loads of money so we can afford our po-rent, rent. Not that. Say, Baller, would you like you to introduce yourself? "Yes!" Baller said. "I'm Baller, I live near the studio!". We know that, Baller. "Okay, okay. I use my plastic rubber red ball as a weapon!", said Baller. Sounds pretty wimpy to me- OW! That hurt. "Haha you're a loser, doubting the MAGIKAL power of my plastic rubber red ball". Ruin one more thing and you're going back to the cardboard box. "Fine, alright. What kind of magical story will I get to do?" You get us some food at the gas station. Here's 5 dollars. "Okay! I'm gonna go on a magical adventureeee!!" Baller says.
Chapter 1: The Adventure to buy bread [Baller's POV] [Balls=Baller's Weapon, not THOSE kind of balls]
Oh boy! I can't wait to go on my magical adventure! I'm gonna head to the magical store to buy the bread! This is going to be worth it! It's much better than living in a box and stealing food! Hey, it's a street! I better cross it. Oh no a car is going to hit me! I won't let that happen! HI-YAHHHHHHHHHHH! Haha, take that, car! You bursted into flames because my supply of balls is too good for you! [A chain reaction happens, sending about 20 cars to explode and burst into flames]. Wow, my Balls must be too HOT for the cars to withstand it!
Here we go! I'm at the store of power! Hey, look at all these magical food items! It's better than the rats I eat sometimes. Here we go, I got the bread of power, and maybe a soda. Hello, cashier! I want to buy this bread! "You don't have enough money" the Cashier says. AH SCREW YOU, THIS IS ENOUGH MONEY! [Baller chucks his rubber red ball into the cashier's face]. Oh no, this isn't a normal cashier! It's a super cashier! "Muwhahahahahahaha you will have to pay double for that!" The supercashier says, taunting Baller. WHAT! NOOOOO!! THAT'S IT. TASTE THE FURY OF MY RUBBER BALLS! [Baller chucks his Rubber Balls at the supercashier, knocking out the supercashier, while fleeing the store. The store catches on fire and explodes.] Oh boy, now to go back to the adventure studio! But first, I need to get the cars out of the way with my balls! Ka-Pow! [The cars explode and Baller goes back to the studio.] I'm back with the bread! "Hey, why is the city slowly catching on fire?" The studio guy asks.
That's all for now, wait until the next chapter of the meme cringe fanfiction- staring baller!